need prayers....

[preemie peppie]

I found out last week that my 17 year old daughter is pregnant. Needless to say...I am going through a range of emotions. She is a brilliant girl, honor roll student, works part-time, volunteers...etc.. I'm just in shock...

Her boyfriend broke up with her, which I am so disappointed with. But she knows that she has our love and support...

I guess I just needed to vent and some good thoughts...

[Charlene-renee]

My thoughts are with you...You are a wonderful mom for letting her know she has your love and support!

[lillybenny]

I feel for you. My dd was a straight A student, had a scholarship full ride to any college in Florida, was on the HS dance team, etc. she decided she wanted to get married before graduating HS, just so she could get out of the house because we had rules. Needless to say she got pregnant shortly after that, her husband left her before the baby was even born. She lost her scholarship, etc.

I have a beautiful grandson though and I just focus on him and the sunshine he brings into all our lives. It is hard to see my dd waste her potential , but I don't focus on that. I know that being angry with her or sad is not going to change what has happened, so we revaluated her life goals and they are still possible and you are doing a great job to support her and stand by her. This doesn't mean the end of her dreams or your dreams for her, it just means they will have to be adjusted and it will be a little harder, but it will still be achievable especially with your support. To get by, just focus on the fact you will have a beautiful grandchild, who will bring a lot of love into all of your lives. My thoughts and prayers are with you. If you need to talk, please feel free to PM me. It will be okay, I promise.

[LibbyRutt]

You will all be in my thoughts as well. I agree that you are a great mom for letting her know that she has your love and support. So many times parents get so caught up in the disappointment and shock and forget to let their children know that even though they made a mistake, it doesn't mean they love them any less. Keep us posted.

[Baffle]

My thoughts are with you. It sounds like you're making the best of what can only be a difficult situation.....and it should probably strengthen what already sounds like a strong bond between you.

Barb

[KirbysMama]

Thoughts are with you.

I also want to chime in I work with a girl now 27 that had her first child at 13. It was difficult for her as she didn't have a stable home life but she got herself to finish HS and worked with me for about six years. She is now going to college to become a nurse. It isn't the best sitution but like Lillybean said it doesn't mean that her dreams can't be reached

[trueby]

My daughter is only 10, but trust me these thoughts have crossed my mind. You just never know how you will react when these things happen. It must be very difficult to keep your emotions in check and be supportive, hang in there..hugs to you both.

[Mom2Hershey]

Ugh what news to deal with, right! I hate to say it but I'm no surprised a teenage boy broke it off with her...it's a shame.

I agree, her goals will have to be adjusted and IMO while I know as a mom I would help my son if he ever was in this situation...but they also much know it is their child and with it comes resonsiblity and a huge change in life.

I know a very personal question but would she consider giving the child up for adoption?

[AnnLee&Me]

Thoughts and prayers for you and your daughter.

Both of my brothers had children at a very, very young age. They both married the mother of their children shortly thereafter. The children, all 3 of them, are wonderful kids and I could not imagine life without them...and their parents feel the same way. Today, both brothers have gone through bitter divorces. At different times, both of them have shared with me that they felt pressured to marry because of the kids. They stuck it out for as long as you can expect a person to stay in a loveless marriage, but eventually things fell apart. The divorces have been hard on all parties involved, but hardest on the children.

I guess my point is - try not to be upset that the boyfriend broke up with her. It may be hard now, but it may be for the best as well. As hard as life was for both of my brothers working low paying jobs with a kid to support, neither of them even want to think of imagining life without their boys. It's funny how a single smile on a child's face can erase hard times of the past.

With you sharing your strength with your daughter, you will get through this.

[preemie peppie]

Thank you all for the wonderful comments! Its funny how an encouraging word can just lift you up that little bit when you need it!

We saw the ultra-sound on Monday...seeing that little person in there moving and sucking their thumb...really makes it REAL!!!!

I know my daughter will finish school and make the best of this situation, even if the father doesn't want to be involved. That will ultimately be his loss...

I'm still coming to grips with the fact that I will be a GRANDMOTHER!!! BEFORE I'M 40!!! ugggh!

P.S. Thanks Lillybenny...your grandson is ADORABLE!

[3Muttsketeers]

Many good thoughts for your daughter and her baby.

Just keep giving her your support and love! She'll make it!

[aday]

everything will be ok!

[HunterBoozer]

My daughter was 23 when Belle was born. I went through the range of emotions as well because before I knew she was pregnant, she kept telling me she wasn't, she didn't feel well, etc.... I made an appt. at my OB/GYN and told her she needed to go in. She asked me to go with her but I told her I'd wait in the waiting room so she'd have privacy. Well, she came out of there crying and all I heard was stop at the desk and make another appointment.

Well, after her insisting she hadn't been with anyone, she wasn't pregnant (even though I had been questioning her for a couple of months), I'm not thinking the worst - cancer or something else terrible. I kept asking her what was wrong and she said she couldn't tell me. I was starting to freak because even at THAT point, she told me she wasn't pregnant. I was about to go back into the office and demand to know what was going on because she wouldn't tell me. She finally told me and I didn't know what to say/do. I was relieved it wasn't cancer or something like that, but at the same time, I thought, how is she going to take care of a baby?

Well, the end result was Belle. Both of them have been living with me for the last 7 years. I've been there for Belle from the day I found out about her. I went to every doctor visit, was in the delivery room, and have basically raised her (my daughter work's nights so Matt and I have had Belle every night since she came home). I probably wouldn't change anything if we could go back. I love Belle more than anything and I'd do everything to help her out. I call her my "mini-me" because she is my clone.

On the other hand, I was 17 when my son was born. I was forced to get married by my parents and his side. I was a senior in high school. I got married in April, graduated in June, and gave birth in October. It was the biggest mistake I ever made (getting married). My MIL was only 34 when she became a grandmother. Needless to say, everyone freaked out. At least I was 42 when Belle was born!

After the emotions settle down a bit, things usually work out. Its actually fun to be a young grandmother because no one believes you are one. You can have a lot of fun with them - its SO much different than raising your own kids.

If you need to vent, discuss anything, please feel free to PM me. I've been on both sides and both times, the memories are VERY fresh in my mind!

[Nallah06]

You are doing whats right. Being there for her and offering your support.

My thoughts & prayers will be with her and you during this time.....she sounds like a smart girl, she will figure things out. And like the others said, maybe it is best that her boyfriend left.....she doesn't need to put up with that drama.

[Golightly Labs]

I wish you all the patience and love as you go through this. I believe that it definitely doesn't need to be a bad thing to be a young grandma! Think about the energy you will have to be with your grandchild. The more supportive your family can be to your daughter, the better chance she will have to live a full and successful life. These things happen, it's not the end of the world.