-
My Jules is gone
On December 14th we said goodbye to my Jules. I am completely heart broken and I don't know how to deal with it. He was my first dog and I've had him for 12.5 years (He was 12 years and 8 months when he passed). I am still crying almost every day. I just don't know how to deal. I feel like my kid is gone. It's strange not to see him on my rug or follow me around the house.
We had to put him down. For a while now he was losing his bowels (sometimes he didn't even know it). Since he stopped taking walks his hips declined rapidly and he lost 10 lbs. So with the muscle loss came the difficulty to get up. We had to help him stand up half the time. It was so painful to watch him decline so quickly. I had to bribe him to go outside to walk around the yard. And although I tried to get him out I still feel so guilty. I'm constantly thinking that I could've done something else to keep him moving though I don't know what. You could hear his hips cracking when he moved. We added a third medication to his cocktail. He wasn't doing anything he liked (aside from just loving to get treats and attention). The last few days before his passing I realized that he wasn't coming to me to get pet when I sat 5 feet away from him. Instead he developed this talking bark that said, "come pet me!". He never did that before. I realized then that he must be in a lot of pain. But boy did that dog have a high pain tolerance!
Part of me thought I'd feel relief with not having to watch him so void of enjoyment for things he once loved. But I feel no relief. Instead I wish he was still here. He loved going outside. He loved playing fetch with his ball at home. He loved humping his sofa (haha!). He liked to follow me around the house just to be next to me. He was always in the kitchen with me just in case I dropped some food on the floor. Only after he passed did I realize that he stopped doing all of those things.
I miss him a lot. How long does this grief last?! I'm at a point where I don't even want to come home because there's no Jules there to greet me.
-
So sorry for your loss. The pain will stay forever but it will lessen with time. Run free sweet boy.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
-
I'm so sorry, Run Free Jules.
Of course you miss him, I hope you always do. But you miss the happy, hearty, healthy Jules. In time you will be able to think of him with more smiles than tears. It's hard, I don't know how long it will take. Something will set me off and I will miss a pet, or person, who has been gone for a long time, decades. Most often I will smile but sometimes, still, there are tears.
-
I'm so sorry to read about Jules. Yes, the sadness can last for quite a while but with time it seems like the good memories start to outweigh the sad. He clearly did his job here on earth well, giving and receiving love and companionship. They are family members in every sense of the word. Rest in Peace, Jules.
-
I'm so sorry. He knew you'd spare him unnecessary pain and fear...you did the right thing for him. :image019:
Run free, sweet boy.
-
Run free Jules.
I'm so sorry for your loss, and grateful that you loved him so deeply. I recently lost my sweet boy and it still hurts every day. I am finally able to enjoy sweet memories of him without the overwhelming sense of emptiness. It will come to you too.
-
I'm so sorry for your loss. The only advice I have is to take care of yourself. Take it one day at a time.
-
@MontananDacota Sorry for your loss as well. Emptiness is exactly that feeling. It's awful. I feel like my house has no life in it even though I have a 3 yr old boy running around. It's just not he same without my silly dog :(
-
I am really sorry to hear about Jules's passing. Run free sweet boy.
-
I'm so sorry for your loss. We never get over the loss, we just learn to deal with. Everyone grieves in a different way. Try to dwell on the good times.