Help, I am at the end of my rope

[TuMicks]

Haven't had time to read all responses. Sorry if I'm repeating. I have to get up at 3 AM.

MJ... the dog won't know that he hurt you or that you are hurting (even if he didn't do it.) But he can be taught to respond to your vocalization. Aaaagh! Is perfectly good. Whatever sound is natural for you (for me it might be Ah Sh1t... but whatever is a normal expletive or outcry for you.) Should mean COME SIT BY ME to Fenway.

It does sound like Fenway has learned a huge amount. But, he isn't trained. Let me explain. A trained response is (1) Taught. (2) Reinforced. And (3) Practiced. He's learned the commands. He may have been reinforced in controlled settings. But it seems that you and Fenway are being sent off to practice on your own.

He's a dog. He isn't deliberately letting you down. Some of the most demanding Field trainers in the world will tell you that dogs don't try to screw handlers. They haven't been taught/reinforced/practiced on the requisite commands in the contexts that he is encountering.

If you see no recourse, yes... rehome Fenway. But before getting another pup, have a heart to heart with the trainer and tell her that you've been pretty heartbroken about this (not to mention physically harmed... fortunately not severely, thank God) and that you want to be very, very clear that you can't have another failure.

[Meeps83]

I'm also curious, but why did you opt for a puppy as opposed to an adult? Were you trying to bond more closely and it just hasn't worked?

[Tanya]

how did you find this trainer? what are their experience and qualifications to be training a service dog? they actually went to pick a breeder and puppy for you?

and i agree - I don't think anything is getting lost in the communication. it does not sound like this dog and you are a good fit. best to let him find a more suitable home while he's still young and for your to start with another dog that is a better fit (again maybe skip the puppy stage and get an adult dog either already trained OR a dog who has the basics down and correct "fit" and you can train the "extras").

In the meantime I'd cut the walks with your pup. if they are dangerous to both of you they need to stop unless they are short TRAINING walks (short!). Find alternative exercise solutions.

Being a working dog is hard work and very few dogs are cut out for it. it's possible and likely this boy just isn't a candidate for the kind of work you need him to do. at least not now and likely not for a bit. But if on top of that you have no bond or trust that will compound things no matter how many commands he is learning.

[peep_erz]

What you are expecting IMO is not to be expected with consistency with any 9month old lab. A service dog like you are expecting come from a trained service dog handler. Not the person utilizing that service dog. From what i've read I think you are endangering yourself by staying with this pup. Not because the pup is dangerous but because you two are not a good match.

I fostered a trained search and rescue dog candidate. I thought he would be great because he has so much advanced training. Our personalities did not match at all and while he was a wonderful dog I was very happy to see him adopted out to a nice man who matched him a lot better than my family.

[Snowshoe]

It could very well be that Fenway IS service dog material but for a different kind of service. The first Detector Dog our local Game warden's office had was a Seeing Eye dog reject. She was deemed just too much energy for a blind person. She became a fantastic aid to our Conservation Officer friend but even so, it was tons of work for both of them. Maybe Fenway deserves a chance to shine in another area?

[Tanya]

It could very well be that Fenway IS service dog material but for a different kind of service. The first Detector Dog our local Game warden's office had was a Seeing Eye dog reject. She was deemed just too much energy for a blind person. She became a fantastic aid to our Conservation Officer friend but even so, it was tons of work for both of them. Maybe Fenway deserves a chance to shine in another area?

Absolutely! my dad's friend has a service dog (he is blind). He gets them from a reputable group that raises and trains them before he goes for training/getting his dog. there were some complications with his last two dogs - one had joint issues and could not walk enough to be his guide and the other had a skin issue (he went back to be treated by the organisation). Both dogs were returned and found new "jobs" that were better suited to them. Things are going well with his current dog thankfully! even a working dog isn't a fit for ALL situations/jobs.

[zd262]

I echo everything that has been written, but I am curious why you are not willing to try a head halter even at the urging of your trainer? If you disagree with your trainer's suggestions, they are probably not the right trainer for you. I am not pro, or anti head halters, different dogs need different training tools. But if she is able to prove that she has had success with using this type of training tool, and if you really want to try to make it work with Fenway, then why not give it a shot?

[Abulafia]

At present I cannot ever see myself trusting Fenway not to hurt me because he is oblivious to my pain. If I fix the zooming what new way is he going to find to hurt me?

The above suggests that you have developed a toxic relationship with Fenway, and I don't see how this can be rectified. Not only have you not bonded with him; you appear resistant to such a bonding, actively distrust him, and attribute to him a malice and apathy that I think are highly unlikely.

I think that both you and Fenway deserve more suitable partners.

[JenC]

Honestly, if the dog's end goal is a service dog and you can't make it work with him now, I would return him before you waste anymore time.

[jules]

I'm sorry to hear of all the troubles you are having and I am right there with you ,except the bond with your dog.Packer will turn 1 year old tomorrow,he has tons of energy and we are on our 3rd trainer.I have a training facility near me that actually keeps the dog for 3 weeks.They give the dog daily training and certify the dog for apartment living,in NY your dog needs some type of certification in order for you to move into the apartment with the dog,after the 3 weeks at their facility they bring the dog back to your place and a trainer stays with you and your dog to train you with the dog all the commands and manners they have tought the dog over the previous 3 weeks.It was a little too expensive for me,(my wife didn't want to pay the $2000.00 fee but it sounds like something that may work for you,I have a trainer that I meet with once a week with Packer 1 on 1 and I have found out some tips from her that now tires packer out for a few hours when I come home from work and by that time it's time for bed , but if you really want to keep the pup this is something that might work for you,this is my 3rd chocolate lab in 25years and by far the worst that I have had that I can remember but my wife constantly reminds me of our 1st Zach that used to eat our cactus plants but hang in there and good luck,Packer gets the zoomies in our living room almost going thru my bay window