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I really liked all of your post but this sentence sums everything up perfectly.

The Labrador Retriever Club standard regarding temperament says:

True Labrador Retriever temperament is as much a hallmark of the breed as the "otter" tail. The ideal disposition is one of a...

I am so glad I am not the only one shaking my head over this.

As for barking, none of my Labs have been barkers, I have never found them to be vocal in that way. Grumbles, moaning and snoring,...