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  1. #1
    Real Retriever Moby and Barley's Mom's Avatar
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    update on the horrible decision

    My husband came home with Barley and has decided that it may be better if I take him since he does not really know what he is going to do next but travel around in the RV. This makes me very happy but I am worried. He now does not believe the two expert estimates we have gotten on our house and he may force me to put it on the market to get more money out of it and thus I most likely would have to move and displace the dogs and second, I feel like much of the routine and training I have done with Barley has been lost since my husband took him for two weeks. He has had three accidents in the house today. I have been very distressed and emotional and I worry that this is adversely affecting the dogs as well. I am doing my best to keep routine and seem positive around them but it is really hard at times. Do you think this may be why Barley is having accidents, etc.? This is such an important developmental time for a puppy and I am worried that all this disruption with the have adverse effects. Any suggestions?
    Forever in my heart - Sweet gentle Moby - lover of belly rubs, bacon, and Barbara 9-10-2001 to 11-2-2015

  2. #2
    Senior Dog Maxx&Emma's Avatar
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    Two weeks of no training may have set Barley back a bit but you can quickly reverse that. Just go back to basics, he will remember pretty quickly. (Labs are really very smart and they live to please you!) Your emotional state may be affecting the dogs, they are sensitive and pick up on more than some give them credit for. Obviously you are going through a tough time and there isn't much you can do to control that. Just make sure to keep regular routines like play, walks, feeding, walks and training so the dogs feel secure.

    If you have had 2 appraisers out to value your home what makes your husband think it can be sold for more than what an expert thinks? Putting it on the market may prove to him the experts were right and it may not. If you do have to move, the dogs will be fine. As long as they have their person and routine they adjust pretty quickly. At this point, let that be the least of your worries. I know moving and leaving your home is stressful but you are keeping the dogs together with you and that is a major victory. Hang in there!
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    Maxx and Emma Jean

    Ozzy - 10/2002 - 06/2011 - Rest well my sweet boy. You are forever remembered, forever missed, forever in my heart.

  3. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Maxx&Emma For This Useful Post:

    Moby and Barley's Mom (10-15-2014), OHfemail (10-16-2014)

  4. #3
    Senior Dog
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    The dogs will be fine...Whew, so glad that decision forced itself...and Barley just needs to get back into his routine and continue with what you were already doing. Those two weeks were just a shake-up for him.

    Good luck with the house....hope that turns out in your favor, too.

  5. The Following User Says Thank You to SunDance For This Useful Post:

    Moby and Barley's Mom (10-15-2014)

  6. #4
    Real Retriever Murphy030813's Avatar
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    Just wanted to say that I'm glad to hear Barley is back with you - the rest will sort itself out!!!!! Hug your little buddies!!!

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    Moby and Barley's Mom (10-15-2014)

  8. #5
    Senior Dog Halcyon's Avatar
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    Glad Barley is home safe and sound and even better that you can keep both dogs. Hope all goes well with the house. Hang in there!
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    "He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true until the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion." - Anonymous



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    Moby and Barley's Mom (10-15-2014)

  10. #6
    Real Retriever
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    Glad Barley is back home with you. I had to move for a few months while my ex & I got some house issues reolved. I took the boys with me and they adjusted fine. As long as they were with me they were ok. Get Barley back into his routine. Stand your ground and don't let this get the best of you. Talk to your attorney. If you haven't gotten one yet, please do so. Separation/divorce is hard. Praying it all works out for the best.

  11. The Following User Says Thank You to Ruger's Mom For This Useful Post:

    Moby and Barley's Mom (10-15-2014)

  12. #7
    Senior Dog
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    glad the dog is back with you and for sure, that could be the stress to set him back.

    consult with an atty and don't let anyone push you around.

  13. The Following User Says Thank You to bett For This Useful Post:

    Moby and Barley's Mom (10-15-2014)

  14. #8
    Senior Dog POPTOP's Avatar
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    So glad to hear Barley is back home. Like other's have said, getting him back on a routine will do the trick. He probably was not on any schedule at all while he was gone.

    Do get an attorney. Sounds like he will try anything to make this difficult for you and you do not need to go through his aggravation. DD has learned that, she wanted everything to be nice. She soon found out she had to put her big girl panties on and stand her ground. Her attorney has been a tremendous help keeping things on a more level field.

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    Moby and Barley's Mom (10-15-2014)

  16. #9
    Senior Dog arentspowell's Avatar
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    Glad to hear you got Barley back. Don't stress about him, he will adjust to his routine again in no time.

    Have you ever heard of collaborative law? I had the opportunity to hear a lecture from a lawyer that practices this type of law in divorce cases. My take away from the lecture is that this type of law is very problem-solving oriented and generally leads to positive outcomes in a process that tends to be ugly. Could be worth it to look into it.

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    Moby and Barley's Mom (10-15-2014)

  18. #10
    Senior Dog Scoutpout's Avatar
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    so glad that he's seen the light about the dogs. Now on to the house, its hard when they get an idea in their head. I would definitely get a GOOD attorney straight away. Something along the lines of if he insists on putting it on the market at a way different price than you've already had it appraised at, any costs associated with that will be born by him, not you. You don't have to be nasty about, just firm, in that he's decided to end your partnership, and therefore you now need to make sure your best interests are protected, because it isn't all about "us" anymore

  19. The Following User Says Thank You to Scoutpout For This Useful Post:

    Moby and Barley's Mom (10-15-2014)

 



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