Sorry, i ve been missing and pretty crazy

[bett]

it's been very long and very crazy. on the 16th of feb i go in for pre-surgical testing, then to my internist for clearance. i never knew it was possible but they are taking out the hardware. so, i go to the dr with nick, and my dear friend cristina the shrink. thank you God. i told dr ding that the point where the plate on the inside of the ankle, where it meets the sneaker (and don't think it was easy to find the right sneakers) ….hurts. he said "we can take care of that". i must have really have had the "dumb face" because it never came up in conversation, probably because he didnt want to give me "false hopes" and so …..meanwhile on the 25th hardware comes out.
he told me that studies show, that 100% of the people who take it out are happy, and 50% have less pain. ok, so what happens to the other 50%?
i called him and he called back letting me know 1. you are still going to have pain (i kind of thought that but somehow we never went there, but arthritis is there already so…..) 2. i think, but have no real memory of what he said about the other 50% but i think i heard "we'll give it our best shot". ok, do that.

i have never this entire time been this scared, nervous, anxious and cracked.

i will speak with cristina later and hopefully my brain will work enough that i will understand what's going on. right now, I'm perseverating (and that was in all caps so i know she's not happy with me on that one) and i hope i can keep it together enough to get thru this, (in and out, and i walk out, two weeks of pain and then i don't know).

and to add to my joy, jake is failing. like really failing. my poor sweet 13 year old gentle boy is failing and i only hope he can hang on for selfish me. he's deaf as can be, slow, falls easily down steps, and is just tired and old. i will always do the right thing, but that time isn't here yet. it needs to stay away for now.
i just cant.

so, that's a poor excuse , i guess for being missing but it's the truth. still go to the gym/pt 6 days a week, 2-3 hours a day, doing what i am supposed to but my face isn't exactly glowing these last few days.

i'll get it together, i hope. poor nick, my kids are uptight from seeing me this way as i am usually the strong one. not feeling strong. sorry again for being a dork.

[Snowshoe]

The other 50% have NO pain and that's the group you will fall into, oops bad expression, fit into if I have any say.

Glad to hear there is some light at the end of the tunnel for you but so sorry you are worrying about Jake. Lord help us, he can't be falling down steps too. Good thoughts for Jake, and you. And all of yours.

[bett]

Cycle for Survival: Long Island: Dana Cory Becker - 2016 Events

and i forgot that (dana and cory becker so you really know I'm cracked.)
thanks in advance for everything.

[smartrock]

So good to hear from you! Getting the hardware taken out sounds like it could be a very positive thing! Hopefully the 50% who are not pain free still feel better than they did. I cannot imagine 2-3 hours at the gym, you are a beast! I hope the surgery goes smoothly.

I'm sorry to hear Jake is not doing so well. I agree- we don't need any more falls from anyone in your family.

So good to know that your little Cole is still doing well. (Interestingly, to me, my husband grew up in Roslyn.) I hope their event goes well.

Thanks for the update. We miss you.

[POPTOP]

So sorry you're having continued problems. Maybe it is the hardware that is causing the pain and getting rid of it is the answer, lets pray that it is. Know it feels like a setback that you have to have another surgery but I'm sure that this is going to be the answer and you will recover with much, much less pain.

Have you tried a slip on type shoe? I wear one similar to this: Skechers Performance Women's Go Walk Slip-On Mule | Amazon.com They are very comfortable and don't bother the ankle area. They do stay on very well. Right now I have an ingrown toenail and these are the only shoes that are comfortable. That problem will have to take it's turn while others are being worked on.

So glad to hear Cody is doing well. I'm sure he is going to continue to do so.

Sad to hear about Jake. I know too well what you are going through with him.

Sending you hugs and prayers. I'm so happy you are back. Don't think that just because your news is not all chipper that we don't want to hear from you and support you.

[Mr Kleb]

Hi Betty, it's good to hear from you. You've got a lot going on.

I knew of course that hardware gets put in. I didn't know that it can come out. Being nervous and scared is OK. Best thoughts and wishes that it goes uneventfully as well as your being in the good 50%.

Good to know that Cole's doing well. Nick is back at work, did I miss that?

A hug to you about Jake. Give the sweet boy a scritch.

[Mollysmomma]

Sending along positive thoughts & prayers that your surgery will be successful, and that you will be in much less pain afterward.....I'm sorry to hear that Jake isn't doing so good.

My Molly is 11 yrs old now, & starting to show signs of her age quite a bit, which makes me very sad, & depressed, so I feel like I can't even "go there"...that dog is so precious to me!

I hope you will have a very successful surgery, & you & Jake can get in a lot of great "snuggle time" while you are recuperating! Please keep us posted when you can--everybody misses you when you aren't around as much.....

[janedoe]

Continued good thoughts. I'm so sorry about Jake.

[bett]

hardware can come out, especially if it gives you pain. mine does. the plates, on either side of the ankle bone, are low, which is why most shoes hurt. the just hit the edge. ouch.

I'm just resigned to the fact that the surgery will be done, i'll have two weeks of pain, and hopefully, it will be better than it is now. don't know what else to think.

[Sandra]

I hope you get some relief when the hardware comes out. I'll be thinking of you, and dear Jake.