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I've had kids over the years at school with encopresis. They often had a scheduled time to come the the health suite to use the bathroom and, like you said, if they go, fine, if they don't, fine- Thanks for remembering to come in. They come to the nurse's office rather than use the bathrooms in the hallways or attached to classrooms, just for a little more privacy. Metamucil or Miralax are often used.
Not sure what grade she's in but the school nurse should be a good resource and help out if she needs to do one of her bathroom breaks at school, which many kids do. Plus, having extra underwear at school and supplies to help her clean up might be kept in the nurse's office so she doesn't feel like her classmates are watching her or aware of what's going on. You don't want that to become an issue to deal with as well. It's unlikely that Maggie is the first or only child the nurse will have encountered with this issue.
Some teachers ask kids to wait until recess/snack time/after this lesson/ lunchtime etc to use the bathroom, especially once they're older than kindergarten or first grade. Her bathroom privileges should be liberal so that if she feels like she needs to go, she can go right then, not be asked to wait. I've never had a teacher who wouldn't go along with that. They'd much prefer the student go when they need to rather than clean up after the fact. The school nurse can speak with the teachers to figure out the best way to handle bathroom breaks and the storage of extra clothes. If she takes a bathroom break in the health suite, maybe her Mom could bring in a case of small water bottles, like the 8 ounce size, and after she goes, she could drink a bottle of water before returning to class.
Those are just a few ideas that might make things a little easier for her at school. Hope things work themselves out.
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