I will second, third, fourth the training classes. I also wonder if she associates the leash and you grabbing at her with negative things. Most dogs want to go for a walk or go outside and that desire will usually overcome their apprehension. We actually learned in class how to give grabbing a good association - we started out by simply touching the collar (collar on the dog) and treating. Because sometimes you do just have to grab but it should not be the norm.
DOES she like to go for a walk? If so, here's an idea that worked for me. My problem was not quite the same, all I had was fidgety 5 month old who couldn't stop squirming enough for me to put his collar on. He knew SIT and was working on STAY. One day I got fed up and put the collar and leash on my tall rubber gardening boot that happened to be nearby and out the door I went with the boot for a walk around the house. Out the front, in the back, took off the leash and collar, told the boot it was a "good boot", gave it a treat and ignored the pup for 10 minutes. I tried not to look at him but the expression on his face was priceless. 20 minutes later he was good as gold and sat quietly so I could gear him up and has been mostly good ever since.